This morning I was going about my routine. Cleaning the kitchen, and washing dishes while listening to Spotify. I was blasting Foo Fighters, and the song “Walk” came on. Normally I just go about my business. Not really paying attention to the music or background noise, but this time, Dave Grohl’s words really caught on to my radar.

“Learning to walk again
I believe I’ve waited long enough
Where do I begin?
Learning to talk again
Can’t you see I’ve waited long enough?
Where do I begin?”

Something in his voice send a chill down my spine. I sensed hope, triumph, melancholy, and a hint of optimism. I wonder if he had a spiritual awakening? Perhaps a climax in his journey when he wrote this song? Then, my mind suddenly whisked me away to Bangalore India. The city of Bidadi to be exact.

“A million miles away
Your signal in the distance
To whom it may concern
I think I lost my way
Getting good at starting over
Every time that I return”

This past February, I made the boldest decision in my life. I signed up for a 21 day spiritual retreat in India. Yes, I channeled my inner Elizabeth “Liz” Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love) and decided to give a big middle finger to all my limitations, fear, doubts and nonsense that had kept me back for so many years. For the past two years I had been following a Guru on YouTube. His name is Paramahamsa Nithyananda. Some would say I “found him” while seeking answers to my depression, anger, self doubt, and boredom with life. I say “He found me” when I finally decided to get serious with embarking on a spiritual journey and get rid of all the BS and drama in my life.

The deeper I got into my Guru’s teachings, the more fulfilled and happy I became. When I found out that he conducts a 21 day meditation program called Inner Awakening I really wanted to participate and experience it for myself. I read many testimonials and watched videos made by devotees. They all sounded the same; Too good to be true.

“Man!” I thought, “These guys are really good at marketing”. How could anyone be that blissed out? These people had to be on something! The skeptic in me was resistant to Swamiji’s (our nickname for Nithyananda) charm. However, the seeker in me really wanted to find out more. I craved peace, and something inside me felt that Swamiji was the real deal and would lead me to the light I so desperately needed.

So with that said, after many obstacles and hurdles on February 1st 2016 I hopped on a plane and 23 hours later, this eagle landed in the coolest spiritual Disneyland on earth. I spent a total of 28 days at the Nithyananda Bidadi Adheenam. During this time I experienced the craziest, most awesome, intriguing, deep, life changing events. The possible, impossible and in between!

Great times at Inner Awakening

April 2nd 2016. My kitchen – Gardena California.

Dave is still singing :

“Do you remember the days?
We built these paper mountains
Then sat and watched them burn
I think I found my place
Can’t you feel it growing stronger
Little conquerors”

Yes, my dear Rock God. I think I found my place in India, and I am growing stronger.

Headbanging, dancing, and drumming on dirty pots I scream along to the song.

“For the very first time
Don’t you pay no mind
Set me free, again
To keep alive, a moment at a time
That’s still inside, a whisper to a riot
The sacrifice, the knowing to survive
The first decline, another state of mind
I’m on my knees, I’m praying for a sign
Forever, whenever, I never wanna die”

I never wanna die. I want to experience eternal bliss.

To learn more about Paramahamsa Nithyananda and Inner Awakening visit the website

Listen to “Walk” by Foo Fighters here.





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